Killing two birds with one stone
Some obnoxious people like to see the silver lining in every cloud and say every problem is an opportunity.
Well, in my better moods I might agree, at least for the sake of argument.
Ideally, for any problem you don't want to face, it is best to make the problem go away by redirecting it to become someone else's problem - ideally someone you don't like.
Responsibility is a nebulous thing after all, easily manipulated in the messy world of politics.
Okay, let me try a hand at this game:
1) Minnesota's economy is unreasonably addicted to oil imports for our transportation.
2) Minnesotan are unreasonably addicted to gambling.
Similar problems it would seem to me. Both problems require similar solutions - we need a crisis which will get our attention and convince us that perhaps easy street isn't what it seemed.
Come-on, think outside the box - how can we solve both by playing them off each other?
Hmmm... well first we have the Minnesota Republicans think it's unfair that a few indian tribes are making so much money on their casinos without sharing with the deficit spending state government. Let's call them "The A-Whiners".
Second we have silly people in the state who believe it is their god-given right to buy the largest vehicle they can find, and live miles from their regular place of gambling, and think that any price for gasoline over $0.99/gallon is caused by greedy oil companies. Let's call them "The B-Whiners".
Ideally we want the A-Whiners and B-Whiners to scape-goat each other as the cause of their unfortunate problems.
I think the solution is obvious:
Let the Indian Tribes use their ill-gotten wealth for the good of the state.
Instead of pocketing their profits, they ought to use it to subsidize tribal gasoline sales.
The Indians are NOT the Enemy - NO! They're our "friends"! They purchase gasoline at the market rate of $1.90/gallon or whatever (including state excise taxes of course), and then resell it for a pretty $0.99/gallon.
They can promise "50% of all tribal profits will be directed to subsidized gasoline sales."
Of course there must be limits - we don't want people reselling their purchased cheap gas for a pretty profit. NO, just like the $5/change give-aways I remember, they'll track car licenses and limit people to say 1 fill-up or 20 gallons, whichever is less, per week.
Then the Indians will clearly be doing the state a favor in subsidizing travel and gamblers will have an incentive to visit for their weekly gambling AND gasoline fix. Since they can only fill their takes once/week, it'll encourage moderation in their gambling.
Everyone wins.
1) The state gets more gasoline excise tax income
2) The casinos get more business, easily recovering their lost income.
3) The gamblers get their cheap gasoline.
Well, that's just the beginning. After a time the reservations can negociate with the state to expand more casinos within the higher population metro area, and EVEN declaring small corner convenience stores as "tribal businesses" and they can have a few slot machines AND sell their $0.99/gallon gasoline. (They could have a special requirement that purchases require 3 pulls of the slots to qualify for the price - that'll pull in a few more suckers)
Slowly overtime the Indians will gain so much wealth that they can buy out all the oil companies that operate in Minnesota, and gain monopoly power with their subsidy - who can compete with gambling income?!
Well, I've not quite worked out the end-game, but it seems promising so far.
What do you think?
I know, we'd best take this slow. The conspiracy has begun...
Well, in my better moods I might agree, at least for the sake of argument.
Ideally, for any problem you don't want to face, it is best to make the problem go away by redirecting it to become someone else's problem - ideally someone you don't like.
Responsibility is a nebulous thing after all, easily manipulated in the messy world of politics.
Okay, let me try a hand at this game:
1) Minnesota's economy is unreasonably addicted to oil imports for our transportation.
2) Minnesotan are unreasonably addicted to gambling.
Similar problems it would seem to me. Both problems require similar solutions - we need a crisis which will get our attention and convince us that perhaps easy street isn't what it seemed.
Come-on, think outside the box - how can we solve both by playing them off each other?
Hmmm... well first we have the Minnesota Republicans think it's unfair that a few indian tribes are making so much money on their casinos without sharing with the deficit spending state government. Let's call them "The A-Whiners".
Second we have silly people in the state who believe it is their god-given right to buy the largest vehicle they can find, and live miles from their regular place of gambling, and think that any price for gasoline over $0.99/gallon is caused by greedy oil companies. Let's call them "The B-Whiners".
Ideally we want the A-Whiners and B-Whiners to scape-goat each other as the cause of their unfortunate problems.
I think the solution is obvious:
Let the Indian Tribes use their ill-gotten wealth for the good of the state.
Instead of pocketing their profits, they ought to use it to subsidize tribal gasoline sales.
The Indians are NOT the Enemy - NO! They're our "friends"! They purchase gasoline at the market rate of $1.90/gallon or whatever (including state excise taxes of course), and then resell it for a pretty $0.99/gallon.
They can promise "50% of all tribal profits will be directed to subsidized gasoline sales."
Of course there must be limits - we don't want people reselling their purchased cheap gas for a pretty profit. NO, just like the $5/change give-aways I remember, they'll track car licenses and limit people to say 1 fill-up or 20 gallons, whichever is less, per week.
Then the Indians will clearly be doing the state a favor in subsidizing travel and gamblers will have an incentive to visit for their weekly gambling AND gasoline fix. Since they can only fill their takes once/week, it'll encourage moderation in their gambling.
Everyone wins.
1) The state gets more gasoline excise tax income
2) The casinos get more business, easily recovering their lost income.
3) The gamblers get their cheap gasoline.
Well, that's just the beginning. After a time the reservations can negociate with the state to expand more casinos within the higher population metro area, and EVEN declaring small corner convenience stores as "tribal businesses" and they can have a few slot machines AND sell their $0.99/gallon gasoline. (They could have a special requirement that purchases require 3 pulls of the slots to qualify for the price - that'll pull in a few more suckers)
Slowly overtime the Indians will gain so much wealth that they can buy out all the oil companies that operate in Minnesota, and gain monopoly power with their subsidy - who can compete with gambling income?!
Well, I've not quite worked out the end-game, but it seems promising so far.
What do you think?
I know, we'd best take this slow. The conspiracy has begun...
posted by Ares Olympus at 5:48 PM
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